by Nic Olson

Yeah, I’m 6 years old, I think bugs are sweet. I take pictures of them, sometimes kill them, sometimes stare at them for hours. Canada doesn’t have very sweet insects residing in its land mass, but that’s ok, India has got plenty. I have seen quite a few different moths and ants, spiders and huge wasps, and caterpillars the size of your face. One of them is my friend. He lives right outside my window, doesn’t move, doesn’t do much. I haven’t named him yet, and I think that would be the final say of whether I’m a real loser or not, so I’ll hold off for a while.

One day while sitting on my bed, my window was wide open, I leave it open for air circulation throughout the day. Interrupting my music and my computer, 2 huge wasp-like things, flew in, battle royale. They landed on the ground, fluttered around for a while, I killed them with my shoe, took a picture and threw them out. They were huge, so I didn’t mess around. Rule #1 of insect killing, if they are bigger than your bicep, don’t mess around. Rule #2 of insect killing, if they are pink and fluffy, that is a definite sign of a killer, end its life quickly.
I have yet to find a pick and fluffy insect here, but, I’m sure the day is not far off.

I also often find ants running around on the wall, desk, books, my face, chest, arms and legs. Those little guys are speedy, and everywhere. And guess what, as I type right now I see one running across my fingers. We have a special relationship.

Last night I had one of those, ‘Oh mannnn, I have to go to the bathroom, and it has to be like 4am. Why aren’t I a responsible adult and go to the bathroom before I go to bed?’. It was bad. I got up, and halfway through the deed I heard a bit of a rustle and saw something move around. Then, it darted right by me, running over my foot in the process. The thing scared me so bad and almost sprayed everywhere, but held my composure and held other things to keep the bathroom clean.. Wall lizard. He ran into my room, and probably into my mouth as I slept. Then I woke up, and found some mystery thing in my bed, looked like a tarantula leg, but I doubt it. If there was a tarantula in my bed last night, I wouldn’t have woken up to see it’s leg in the morning.

I have also learned many things about vegetation on my trip. Did you know that pineapples grow in the ground? Don’t lie to me, you didn’t know. I had no clue. One of the guys told me, and pointed to a pineapple ‘sprout’ and said that eventually the pineapple would be like sitting on the ground. That’s amazing, and leaves me to ask, what the heck did they teach me in school? Nothing useful or practical, I guess.

Also, for Daphne, I’m pretty sure I eat quite a bit of garlic every day, in every meal, in every dish. But I also eat bananas, and I hear they attract mosquitoes, so I guess I’m balancing it all out. I smell like a regular guy to mosquitoes, but to the girls in India, I probably smell like a foot.