Red Meat

by Nic Olson

And here we be. July 29. As I head home to be unemployed, but first, to be Tim’s work slave. The summer ran by faster than a Yellowknifer towards the… …..and now I’m headed home for a month of unemployed bliss. A concert here, a road trip there, a week long trip to the West Coast (represent) and a whole lot of watching my incredible muscle mass deteriorate before me. Not much better than that. In Elementary school fashion, I’ll let you know how my summer went.

This summer I learned…

About Moving. I now know the proper way to pack a trailer, the right terms for a moving warehouse and moving trucks, names and cubic footage for boxes, how to lift a heavy-as-balls dresser, how to swear with ease (which is important, ask Cindy) and most importantly how to get paid very lots for doing very little. These are all important skills I have gained, which will in the end, make me a better member of society, or something stupid. The job was sweet, the pay was sweeter, working with Arlen was the worst, but you can’t win them all. And most of all I learned, if you have to move all your crap cross country, don’t bother highering Matco…. Your stuff will be in two hundred more pieces than it originally was.

About trailmix. If you ever move to Yellowknife/the Ashby’s house, watch out for some people that lack self-control and can’t handle the rules of trailmix.

About wakeboarding. I’m bad at this game. I also learned to rarely listen to Randy or Benji about what tricks to try, ’cause when you do that, you get a sprained ankle. Looks like my Riverside Open championship win over Jerms is no longer going to work out.

About television in HD. Incredible.

About life. Keep it steady. Mellow it out a little. Keep it smiley… that was gay.