Avoid Success

by Nic Olson

The only thing I feel comfortable wearing over my shoulders and under my backpacks is T-shirts. Button-up long-sleeves are alright, but the boob support that a slightly elastical cotton T-shirt offers is unmatchable. I once had two or three dress shirts, but the last month has seen me lose my only non T-shirt shirts. One has a hole burnt in it.

I started to collect old T-shirts a little while back, noting how many deadly ones I have. World Junior Gold Medal year number one XS tee. Good Clean Fun sleeveless maroon shirt from grade 5. Good Riddance shirt, Canada tour 2001. Only Crime/CHL hybrid. Rider Grey Cup champ longsleeve. My first pingpong Start with Bronze turqouise beauty from grade 3 or something. Old Means stuff. An I Heart India shirt from Delhi in ’08. The best days of my life represented by paint spread on cotton.

I bought a shirt at a show last year. The back of it read, ” SEE, FEEL, THINK, DO”. When I read this at the show, it just felt good. I liked it because it made sense, so I bought it, and think about those words everytime I peel it off the floor and throw it over my head. Good thoughts.

The day after I returned home from India I saw a show and bought another shirt, since I left most of my old ones around the world, and also had no more clean ones left. I bought this one, and didn’t realize the small words hiding in the bigger font, that said “Avoid Success.” Depending on what your of idea is success is, this could be good advice. You can think whatever you would like about it, but to me the word means a compilation of all the crappiest things out there, and usually summed up with an eye full of money. I know these days people say that success can be obtained in many different ways, but I say that success is a place that none of us really want to be at.

So my advice, to avoid success and go to heaven wear more T-shirts. And even wear them to church.