the first one bites the dust.

by Nic Olson

Today begins it. A very long and drawn out wedding season. Beginning in February and ending in hell. Or maybe August. I don’t know. The first wedding is today. Doesn’t matter who it is, you probably don’t know them anyways.  It seems all too trendy these days to tie the knot. Probably because I’m not doing it, it became trendy. Just like how I’m growing my hair out long, it became not trendy to do so. Not cool at all.

This week I got abandoned because of a few other trends. 
Yellowknife, a trend that is dying quickly. 
Going on tour, trendy forever.
Furnaces that work, way too trendy for me. I got left in the ’11degreesCelcius when I woke up’ ice dust.
Having money, trenderiffic. I got paid today, but not enough. Before that I was down to a few quarters and a pack of Wheat Crunch.
The Oscars. The ultimate trend of the trendiest place on earth. No one good ever wins. I mean, I’ve never won one.. 
Travelling overseas. No matter how trendy this is, I’m doing it. Again and again. So stoked. 
Next time I have a feeling that something might be emerging as trendy, I’m putting all my trendless eggs in the trendy basket, and can claim I started it all. Like rocketboots. Or having a completely hairless body.
Congrats to those getting wed. May the happiest day of your life, be the trendiest day of mine.
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