Let’s Straighten a Few Things Out.
by Nic Olson
The first day of the rest of my life has finally arrived. Coming June 18th I’ll no longer be the owner of this monstrous Muppet nose that inhibits fresh air from being cleaned by my nose hairs and entering my lungs. No longer will I wake up with a mouth drier than a camel’s ass, caused by the ever flowing fountain that is my drooling mouth. Nose job, June 18th. If you didn’t know, someday between the age of eight and twenty, I broke my nose, at least once. There is a serious blockade in my left nostril from a large protruding piece of cartilage that has been a friend more than anything for the past ten years. I have picked at it and stroked it over ten million times in my life.
I’m at that point where there is really nothing I can say to accurately express where I am. This isn’t a bad place, nor is it a good place. It’s a place, though. Soon to be a noseless place. A place where others don’t really understand because you can’t explain it to them. One reason that it is not possible to explain is because I don’t know where I am either. I feel like I’m in a big empty field that has a few trees in it. In this feeling I look around and see golden grass, a blue sky, then I look to my left and see someone shooting a firework at me telling me to wake up. That actually happened. My shirt was on fire.
Everything makes less and less sense to me, and my dreams become more and more obscure and unreachable. Buy things, I don’t get it (the senseless). Start a band, impossible (the obscure). Now that I’m back home, it’s great and I actually don’t want to go back (right now), I’m back in this zone. In football it’s called the Red Zone, but when the Rider’s were in their Grey Cup winning season I called it the Green Zone (they were unreal). Within 20 paces of where I want to be, but the three tries just isn’t going to be enough.
i’ve never laughed so hard in my life when your shirt was on fire!!! Good to have you back.
hang in there nic.you are wise beyond your years kid.i don’t really know if there is anything to say that will help. actually i know there isn’t. coming back to North America sucks. you just have to find your groove again and hope it will be a bit different than the one you had before.
Get a nose like the one on the Chicago blackhawks jersey. I would
just go to art school. that is where all lifes mystical questions can be answered.e.
kris and your new nose will have the same birthday.